Big Salad with Roasted Asparagus, Oka and a Poached Egg
A particularly harrowing day today, one that should have ended with a glass (or bottle) of wine. Or Scotch. Or both. At the same time. Out of a paper bag through a straw. But these days I am loath to drink my calories, unless it’s in the form of a Peter’s milkshake I would have to nurse all day long in lieu of meals, considering its 900(ish) calorie price tag.
W ate a bowl of granola at around 5 and then asked for eggs and toast. I obliged, cooked three and put our poached eggs over spring greens and roasted asparagus, with the last of the Oka cheese (the rest went with those Raincoast Crisps, which I feel I’ve eaten my body weight in) and a roasted orange pepper cut into strips. All drizzled with maple-balsamic vinaigrette, which I’d eat on anything. (One New Year’s Eve when I was pregnant I drank a wineglass of balsamic straight-up and it didn’t seem weird at all. Luckily I drank the last of the bottle on my first go, or I’d have no teeth left.)
Still plodding along on this weight loss regime. It has, as it always does, gotten easier. It’s less of a concerted effort and becoming more habit now. I have had to consciously ignore that inner voice that tends to get louder at around 10 pounds in and play the ‘you’re in control of this’ card – hey, you deserve to go get yourself a milkshake! You’ve lost what, fifteen pounds? Sixteen? You deserve this! You’re totally in control now – you can go ahead and order that pizza. You’re so on the ball.
I’m sitting at about 203 now, not much of a change in the past week, but the scale hasn’t been going up again either. I am feeling much better for it. More streamlined and better able to move through my life. Or I was, until I had to spend the past two days trying on clothes in front of two (very nice) stylists charged with picking my wardrobe for the show. (Or more accurately, one: charged with, other: friend along for the trip.) Bright colours, no stripes, no short sleeves on account of my flabby, scarred, stretch-marked and fishbelly-white upper arms. The hours-long parade of three-way full-length mirrors under fluorescent lights and scrutiny deflated me a little. Or maybe a lot.
But. I didn’t drown my sorrows in anything edible. (Nor, unfortunately, drinkable.) The half jar of Nutella is still sitting untouched on my shelf. I did not say f*ck this, I’m still wearing size 18s here and have three tiers of back rolls which Spanx really only even out into rolling waves, and the camera adds ten pounds and there are three cameras on me, and I’m going to be immortalized on film and broadcast to the world like this, not wanting to turn sideways lest people notice my barrel chest or aforementioned back fat, nor my protruding right thigh that’s a full two inches (I measured) bigger around than my left thigh, and maybe I should just go ahead and be the fat chef, because it’s a lot tastier that way. And easier. (But is it, really? Probably not.)
My brain actually knew better this time than to move in on me while my defenses were down. I’m finally starting to get that it won’t make me feel better to dive headfirst into a box of Chicken on the Way (who makes the very best fries, by the way, dipped in mayo, and corn fritters dunked in honey). I mean it would make me feel bloody fantastic for about 20 minutes, but immediately plunge me into a place I had no desire to go.
So I had my Big Salad (because I needed some greens and I love big salads with lots of stuff in it, not because I’ll just have a salad) and one square of dark chocolate and dug in my heels as strongly as I ever have before. I went and made a pot of tea even though I didn’t really want tea, and had good snotty cry because it does wash away some of the worry, and reminded myself that this really is a hard thing to do. It doesn’t help to live in a world in which Kate Winslet is considered big. Honestly.
Can I, before I get on to the business of Free Stuff, suggest an analogy? One I could only introduce in such a sapped-out state? There is a valuable lesson in the Wizard of Oz. Dorothy learns after monumental efforts to find her way to see the wizard, whom she believes to have All Answers, seeking direction from whomever she comes across, that she must look inside herself to find the way home and that the ability to do so has been with her all along. Of course it was. But it wasn’t until she knew this that she was able to access what she needed to get where she wanted to go. So what if Glinda came along and told you the same – that you can put your faith in people and promises and things, and spend your life searching for the right answer, which might always be changing, but ultimately it’s all up to you and you already have the answer? And although you might not know it you do already possess exactly what you need to bring you home?
If you knew you could do it, would that make a difference?
No, I didn’t dig into that Scotch. Maybe I should.
What IS it with one thigh being inches different from the other? What is it with the effort and fun of bootcamp making BOTH thighs larger? Albeit muscle, but hard to tell when layered under cottage cheese. Tough night for me and I compensated with low cal popcorn and a dilly bar. I am so not feeling good about it right now. *sigh* I do love reading your blog, though. Thanks.
Dilly Bars actually aren’t that bad! It’s the BOX of Dilly Bars that do you in. I was a bit hardcore tonight, don’t compare!
I know this is most likely irrelevant, but sometimes, having one leg bigger than the other can mean blood clots. I know, I complained of pain in my legs to my doctor, and the first thing she did was measure them. I know, its probably not that, but couldn’t hurt to mention it at the next check up you have.
🙂
Sorry to hear you had such a rough day/week even. I think the 3-way mirror plus stylist and tag-along would have been enough to do me in *hugs* I’m glad to hear that regardless of temptation you stuck to one square of chocolate. Bravo! 😀
About the thigh thing…I think it’s due in part to the fact that no one is totally symmetrical eg: my feet are 7 & almost 7&1/2 (in case you’re wondering since shoe size was discussed earlier… I’m just under 5ft4.) that and we have a “dominant” hand/side we do things with…most people who aren’t ambidextrous anyway.
Love the look of the salad. I only wish my dinner was that healthy and balanced. Dinner tonight was on my 15 min break at W-S. Almonds from Shoppers, and a 1/2 Caf Americano and a too big soft ginger cookie from Starbucks. Scale is at 192 and holding.
I had a pretty rough week as well, thankfully no one made me try on clothes to top it off. As it was, dinner last night was wine (and yes I listed it first), hummus, pepperoni, and chips and Renee’s roasted garlic dressing. I love documenting my crap meals.
I think you’re doing awesome, and I know you’re helping more people than you can imagine with this blog. Dinner was also a big salad, with a bowl of homemade roasted butternut squash soup. Plus our traditional Friday night ice cream and chocolate sauce…
Julie, if it’s any consolation, I have one boob bigger than the other. It’s hard enough finding a proper bra when you are a only-in-the-specialty-lingerie-stores (i.e. Knickers & Lace) size, never mind two unmatched boobs!
your experience with the stylist and friend reminded me of the 360 mirror on what not to wear….not for the faint of heart!
I think you look great!
And speaking of stripes, I will never, ever, understand plus size clothing stores. What makes the buyers for said stores think that horizontal stripes are a good thing?
Last night dinner was salmon burgers, Alexia potato wedges, corn.
Wow what a rough week uh!
Well even though I moved my butt all week, aerobics, elliptical, walking in snow, the friggin scale is just not budging…and last night after taking my 1 hour walk, I gave in to a caramel McSunday!!!
I wish I could BELEIVE that I CAN do it….but I’m just not there, it seems I try hard but my fat just won’t budge!
I love your blog, keeps me sane 😉 well partly anyways…lol
Did I read right…package going to Ontario???
Have a good weekend Julie.
MFO
Don’t you think the weather makes it more difficult too? Once spring hits it gets easier for me to eat healthier. I had pumpkin black bean soup last night…very good.
question: I made the brown/wild rice salad you posted a couple of days a go. It is for dinner tonight. What is a bunch of parsley to you? My “bunch” from the store is bigger than a gallon sized bag… that seemed too much. So I just chopped what looked right — Did you do a handful??
thanks,
Yes – a big handful! It’s a salad, so really whatever you think.. it’s a matter of taste! I cram a lot in so that I can get more greens in…
I do love that salad photo. Despite a severe egg poaching ineptitude (is it a mental block?), draping an egg over a bunch of greens is one of the most comforting thoughts.
It has been one of those weeks all around hasn’t it? Does the chinook do more than give us headaches cause I’d like to be able to blame something specific…
Sending hugs and positive thoughts your way regardless. It’s so important for all of us to support each other (not just during weight loss but as women in general). As a L&D nurse I can really see the need for us to re-open those doors, take the pressure off of ourselves to be and do it all, and enjoy fresh air and sunshine. OK maybe I just need a drink as well! But I’ve got ideas baby – big ideas for how to reclaim what we so richly need!!
Dinner last night was good old perogies, light sour cream and lots of fresh veggies with light dip. I love carrot sticks and dip!
The three way mirror and helpful onlookers is guaranteed to pop any feelings of accomplishment like a balloon. Sigh….You look great though, roots sweater and all. I just wish I had your height thing out for me…5’3″ and 220+. I like to think its mostly muscle and boob haha.
I’ve had a bad week too many times to the coffee shop with friends, can’t say no to the cranberry white chocolate scone…evil baker guy. Your doing so well it inspires me though….:) Thankyou!!!!
I just love the poached egg idea as well. It is clear the egg was poached by someone who knows what she’s doing: no stringy bits tentacling off the sides of a lonely yolk, or (confessions)obvious signs of an “egg poaching” cup being used.
Can I go back a day to a ‘healthy’ meal? of course not. Dinner last night was pizza at riverstone pub. With a pint of Big Rock trad. (Big salad and small veggie lasagne the night before, truly!)
-Carol SB
That salad looks awesome! I had a big salad last night too – spinach, roasted red pepper, asparagus & garlic, balsamic dressing and goat cheese. A slice of garlic bread and a glass of shiraz on the side though.
My thighs are quite different sizes too – enough that I don’t wear fitted pants in public as it’s very noticeable (as in, I’ve had people notice and comment on it!). I’d guess probably 3-4 inches although I’ve never measured.
Wow!! you’ve lost weight!! that’s what counts-the scale going down NOT up!! i’m working with you. what a great idea-the salad with a poached egg-gotta try that one. keep on keeping on! Thanks for cheering me on & encouraging me as well to lose weight. we are in this together!! 🙂 keep up the good work!! don’t know how do you it-making food-for family, CBC, cookbooks, etc & still lose weight. you go girl!!
May next week bring better things! Don’t worry too much about people judging your TV appearance – remember you are always your own worst critic.
i had me some tex-mex lasagna, recipe from cooking light series, garnished with 7% sour cream and some cilantro. a handful of lime and sea salt flavoured tortilla chips and no ice cream, as is my friday night ritual, because i ate some tortilla chips. a beer would’ve been good it’s january and i’m abstaining.
sometimes you just have to gather up your inner warrior, whoever that is. i like to think of myself as a roller derby chick–you know those muscular buxom chicks who race around the track with their elbows out? come to think of it, their inside thigh would have to be bigger than their outside one, given the angle of the track and the effort required on tight corners…
I absolutely love salad, and could eat it every day, which is lucky. I am going to mexico with my girlfriends in 2 weeks and we all are being very food-conscious right now. Hopefully working hard now will make it so the fruity drinks we are bound to have wont be soo bad later. So we are sticking to protein and greens right now. Salad is perfect for that. That was my lunch yesterday. My dinner was stir fried chicken and veggies. No rice necessary. Oh will power!
Somehow I always am able to justify that bottle of wine over the glass – you have willpower! Love that kind of salad too – poached eggs are so good with the acidity of the viniagrette – mmm! Beautiful photo too!
I love your Wizard of Oz analogy! Do you think you could tell me more about your maple vinaigrette?? I’m always looking for new salad dressing recipes. As much as I love the classic balsamic rendition, it’s nice to switch it up! Have a fabulous weekend!
Is maple balsamic a type of vinegar that can me made athome? is sounds awesome. congrats on weight loss keep it up! dinner last night was something I thought I made up then googles it, and no. Instead of making cabbage rolls I put all the ingredients using turkey instead of ground beef, and shred the cabbage, and cook in slow cooker…then it can be served over rice instead of putting the rice in. Yummy nutritious and somehow comforting in the winter.
My stick-to-it-ness in the eating department seems to have come and gone repeatedly in the last week, but have been more consistent in the exercise department. One battle at a time guess!
Julie, I love your frankness and humour…we all struggle with so many of those same things and your take on them encourages me to have a giggle, pick my self up, and get going again. Thank you.
Monday I started a week of fat flushing diet. With Flax seed oil.Its very healthy with only salads,proteins and vegetables,
Then the very next day a friend invited me to go to mexico in March..how could I say no.
I now have a good month to really concentrate on getting rid of at least 20 lbs.Is my goal unrealistic?
Thats where this blog comes in… its so inspirationl to read and follow your progress.
I am anxious to see the new season of Its just food.
Your an awesome person. You look lovely in that cozy sweater.
I do have a question. Is it possible to be so good for 6 days and then the 7th day eat what you want and still lose weight?
Lately, Friday nights seem to be the night to clean out the fridge of leftovers, so our suppers never sound good when I post them. It was a pick of: Italian chicken with pasta, pork with a chipotle peanut sauce (your recipe, Julie! my family loves it), or won ton soup for the picky kid. And we had some leftover canned beans so I made a white bean dip with a recipe from Giada.
Have a good week-end!
So much to agree with you about… Spanx and rolling waves, love of maple balsamic dressing, the need for Scotch. I only wish I was better this week. With sick kids and a trip to the emergency room for one I was more than happy to eat pizza for dinner last night. Is root beer better than beer? And I only had two slices, not my usual three.
You are awesome for dealing with the week the way you did! I’m jealous. And when Hubby comes home I’m going for a walk!
Supper was home made Chinese food. I even had my girls rolling spring rolls and finely chopping shrimp and cabbage to put inside. It worked out excellent. They loved the meal and I’m pretty sure it was because they made most of it.
Kitchen clean up was horrible……….. but worth it. 🙂
It’s great to hear you have it a bit easier with the inner brat who loves pizza and shakes. Can your grown up brain talk to my inner brat? Please?
….the tea was such a nice treat. Thanks again Julie! Half the fun is it looks so darn pretty in all the little containers with the chocolate box map. I am working my through it rather quickly –lucky it is tea and not a box of chocolate. For anyone who loves tea, check out the tnik web page and look at the tea sampler boxes –very fun! Would make a really great gift for a tea lover.
And then there are some of us – or at least one or me- who, as soon as your Aunt Pat headed off for 12 days, promptly cooks a batch ( but only 3/4 of the recipe) of your Starting Out chocolate pudding and eats it in one sitting. Love that recipe but it is just too easy.
Let us know when the new season of your show is to start and if any new networks are carrying it.
Here in Edmonton we are in a week of balmy weather and so are BBQing as much as possible. We had grilled chicken,shrimp,mango kebabs with a lime,orange,cumin,honey marinade. We ate it with rice but one of my favorite meals is like you, a big bowl of salad with everything on it including the above mentioned kebabs.
Yum!
I love cooking shows so I’m looking forward to yours. Do you know when and where we’ll be able to see it? I really want to try those rosemary crisps, because they look like the ones they sell at Sunterra here in Calgary, but I fear that if they are the same as the Sunterra ones I may not be able to stop making them! Thanks for sharing so many great dinner ideas with us!
It’s called It’s Just Food and this new season will air on Viva – it’s a new Corus network and I’m not sure what channel it is – depends on where you live, of course!
It took me a while to remember what we had for dinner last night…that’s how ‘meh’ it was. We had the Mediterranean chicken quesadillas from Sunterra…stopped in to snag some cave-aged Gruyere…which I cannot live without. The price has jumped up by $8/kilo. Yikes! It used to waaaayyy cheaper than Janice B.’s, but methinks they’re in the same ballpark now! Is is just me or have food prices soared into the stratosphere lately?
They have!! Interesting that they still are, despite the price of oil and gas dropping so much lately!
In case anyone is interested I found Viva’s site: http://www.myviva.ca
Mountain Time Zone sched for It’s Just Food looks to be Tues 9:30am/Th 9:00am and Fri: 2:30pm Shaw channel 159 (for other providers http://www.myviva.ca/listing.aspx ) 😀
I have poached egg envy. It’s so weird, I used to able to produce a decent poached egg, but I’ve totally lost the ability. Now I have nightmarish yolks leaking out in ribbons from where I unstuck the egg from the pan.
Dinner was tomato/veggie/beef pasta sauce dredged out from the freezer over brown rice rotini. Drizzle of olive oil and grated parmesan.
Your salad looks better though, think I’ll order that next time!
Hi Julie,
Keep up the good work! I’m battling just to get back onto my healthy eating plan and am not going to weigh myself until I know I’ve dropped the last two months weight gain. It really is just persevering. Just watched an episode of What Not to Wear on people who had lost weight and still needed to lose some. What an incredible difference it made to see them in well fitting, stylish clothes! So, your enduring the shopping today will pay off with looking great in your new clothes!
Dinner was a clubhouse sandwich at White Spot drive-in……not exactly on plan!
Rose
Forgot to say, Thank you Erica for giving the information on finding Julie’s show. I’m in Vancouver and saw from your provided link that It’s just Food is on Sunday morning at 9:30 am. First time I’ll get to see it and am looking forward to it.
Rose
It sounds like a rough few days, Julie.
I always feel down after trying on clothes or shopping for them.
I need to replace my scale. Besides rusting out, the numbers got too small. They still measured the weight with room to spare, but the eyes have become too short sighted to focus that far down. And I am sure bending down’ as if to touch your toes makes you heavier – just while on the scale.
Dinner friday night was chicken stir fry with onions, carrots, celery, fresh ginger teriaki sauce and rice.
Angel food cake, ice cream and thawed raspberries for dessert.
Thanks to Erica, I found “It’s Just Food” is aired in Ontario on Tuesdays at 11:30 AM, and on Thursdays at 11 AM on Ch. 91, Cogeco cable. Can’t wait!
….and also on Fridays at 4:30 PM. See you then!
After I wrote the last 2 comments, I went to the gym to a water aerobics class. I left the TV on Ch. 91 for Molly (Lhasa Apso) while I was gone. When I returned, I started making some meals for the week. As I was cleaning up in the kitchen, I heard a voice I recognized and I rushed into the living room, and there you were Julie!!!!! You were showing how to make homemade pasta. What a beautiful day! The sun is shining AND I have you in my home. (I figure you’re my reward for working out!)
I needed a stiff drink by Thursday. A cold has destroyed my good napper (G the 3 month old) and now the nights are starting to go into the toilet. This is not good as my 2 1/2 year old will not tolerate me taking an hour to get G down for his nap for long. =P
Upside to the week is that my scale is still on the downward trend, down 5lb for the month of January. Not too shabby, me thinks.
Dinner of late has been mostly uninspiring and even disappointing. I decided to sortof splurge last night and we ordered in Vietnamese. They sent the wrong kind of sauce, so I had no sauce for my rice vermicelli. I was so annoyed and disappointed and did not enjoy it at all! Time to try the new Vietnamese place in Beacon Hill!
Here’s my healthy-eating/you can do it-credo lately:
‘Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.’ – Emerson
Admittedly, I occasionally substitute the ‘blunders’ for cheese and ‘absurdities’ for red wine. Then I move on.
Thanks for sharing Julie. I can not imagine having to put on clothes in front of that mirror with other people watching! You are so hard on yourself, as I think most of us are. You are doing really well, keep up the good work.
I had a really successful week for a change. I signed up for WW Online and it has been just what I needed… for now anyway. When I’m “in the zone” I can have a really disciplined week or two but maintaining it is the hard part. I’m finding having to record every bite really helps.
Dinner last night at Applebee’s was Tilapia and a salad and I’m happy to say DELICIOUS as well.
I’m very happy to hear that one of your lucky readers in ONTARIO won a prize!
I hope this coming week is better for you than the last one was. Hang in there.
Having people to report to and to track your progress is really half the battle of being committed. Eating salad helps too! I love advacado’s on my salad, and chicken, and pinenuts, and cranberries, and apples, and cheese, and whatever i can find 🙂
I agree it does help, but at the end of the day you have to do it for YOU, and believe that you’re capable of it and worth the effort!
Just wanted to say that even though I was having a ruff day today, I managed to go cross country skiing for an hour, I was sweating when I came home 🙂
Hopefully I do it again tomorrow, it’s supposed to be a nice day again.
Now if the scale and my inner voice could get the picture….grrr.
Have a good week.
MFO
That salad looks fantastic! And I love how everyone in the world has those little plastic bowls from Ikea…everyone with little people in the house.
My sister made my family taco salad tonight. It was a real treat not only to eat, but not to have to plan a single thing. And she brought dilly bars for dessert. And so I had to eat one. Ok, 2. I am searching for my inner motivation to get healthy! I’m sure I left it around here somewhere…
Mores episodes of “I’ts only food” I can hardly wait. I LOVE your show and you look great, wish I had your height (I’m 5’2″) If I was taller I wouldn’t look so fluffy. I too am trying to be healthier in 2009, I agree, once you get your mind set it does seem a little easier but still thinking about every bite that goes in my mouth. Thank you for your blog and your insight into this journey.
I really like big salads too. I always make my own dressing now, haven’t bought dressing for months. They really do taste much better and are quick to make. I always thought it was faster to have a bottle, but I make enough for 2 or 3 days and keep it in the fridge.
The wardrobe thing would be almost than I could bear in the privacy of my own room and one way mirror. Other people’s suggestions on what to wear or not are very helpful and they will do what looks best. The camera will show us it was the right thing to do. I have faith. Is there a time slotted for airing the program?
That salad looks spectacular. I am stopping on the way home for groceries and a big box of greens is definitely on the list..that salad will be perfect on the those nights when John has already fed the kids by the time I get home.
I, too, would love the recipe for the balsamic/maple dressing.
Friday night, I drove 4 hours to meet a dear girlfriend at a B&B for the weekend and upon arrival, I made dirty martinis and a plate of black and green olives, grape tomatoes, and feta cubes which we dipped into our ice-cold drinks and then lightly touched into coarse salt before eating. The weekend consisted of pjs, dvds, sipping and snacking, much laughter and tears, and if I didn’t lose weight, it’s okay as I came home with a light heart.
Now THAT’S worth it’s weight in gold.
This was a party weekend — Book Club, Birthday party, Superbowl party. Lots of temptations that I was mostly able to resist.
I also love the big salads and any dressing made with balsamic — it is so delicious, I can understand why you would drink it.